The World According To G!rL

One of the hardest things to listen to the addict say, is that no one understands unless they are an addict too. . . except they have no idea how their addiction effects those closest to them. They don't realize that the people closest to them, their family, and friends are going through the addiction and dealing with the addiction right along side the addict.

Parents of an addict have it really rough. They can't do much other than just sit back and watch their child slowly kill themselves. . .what a horrible thing to have to watch. They deal with the addict stealing from them to feed the addiction. . .The parents watch as their child goes in and out of jail. . .begging to be bailed out.

The younger siblings watch their big sister/brother completely throw their life away. At such a young age they watch the addict taken out of the home in handcuffs by a sheriff. They watch the addict be kicked out of the home and placed in a youth home, left there while the rest of the family tries to keep life going. They get phone calls in the middle of the night from the addict while they are high/drunk/stoned. . .whatever. . . they have to listen to the addict say how they want to change so bad, when it's just the drugs talking. . .because it happens OVER & OVER. . . they stop trusting the addict. The young siblings are the ones who go over to babysit the addict when they've been using. . .they are the ones that take the addict to the hospital to get fixed up when they've hurt themselves while using. They get yelled at and cursed at and told that they don't care about the addict. . .even when they do everything in their power to help the addict, or be supportive, or encouraging.

The addicts child(ren) suffers so deeply. They get taken away from their mother/father. The child raises the addict instead of being raised by a parent. The child gets themselves up in the morning, they feed themselves, they get themselves off to school. They sit and listen to their parents scream at each other, or hit each other. . .

The addict is NOT alone in their addiction, they don't deal with it by themselves. . .

if you wanna check it out.

I've been a crazy doodler for-forever and used to doodle her pictures all the time. Or when I'd go to her house I would doodle on her napkins or whatever I could get my hands on. I always have a pen in hand...

Anyway I thought it would be fun to post them so I could still draw her pictures even though she just moved away. It's been pretty fun.

:)

What a wonderful message. . . It makes me so grateful that I still have my brother, that he never took his life because of the horrible way people treated him...and still do because he is gay. Or for the fear that his family wouldn't love him if they knew... For the absolute condemnation of his church leaders and the majority of the community... He had so many reasons to give up. . . But I am beyond grateful for the life he still leads today.

So many people have awful opinions of homosexuals. Which is really sad, because for the most part, they are wonderful, amazing people. People who love beyond most. People, not animals. People with amazing talent. People that are clean. People that have beautiful spirits. People who are stronger than most.

I have one of the most incredible brothers in the world. Although I dont have to agree with what he has choosen I still love him very much. He is one of the most genuine and loving people. Anyone who is lucky enough to have him as a friend can atest to the fact that he is the best kind of friend anyone could ask for.

I love you Brother!

            ...and yet I have no way of conveying everything that is rolling around up there. There are so many emotions and thoughts...but no way of releasing them.

I am void of any sensible thought. Just a bunch of muddled and tangled up feelings.

I thought I would be able to sit and release all that is in my heart tonight on my blog... but nothing is coming to me. I've been sitting here staring at this ridiculous moniter for an hour now, (for the second night in a row) with nothing to say but that I can't say anything.

FRUSTRATING!

My Mother is the most absolutely amazing woman I know. 

Over the last few years she has been through so much, and she's truly taught me how to overcome weakness' and how to grow from hard times.

So many times she helped me realize who I was when I would forget... When I'd start to fall away she'd grab on and pull me back to where I belonged... She never gave up on me...when I'm sure I gave her many reasons to give up. She has always loved me...and has never made me doubt that love.

In February she gave me the most gorgeous wedding. She basically did everything. She planned it from the music to the food to the decor... and it was unbelievable. I can't ever thank her enough for this HUGE sacrifice she made for me.

My mom is one of my very best friends in the whole world. The one person I can go and cry to about anything and everything and I know she'll make me feel better, or help me better understand whatever predicament I'm in at the time. I couldn't ask for a better friend. She's always been there to kiss my "owies" and wipe away tears from my cheeks. She's never made me feel inadequate or that she didn't love me.

One of my very most favorite things about her is her unfailing faith in the Lord Jesus Christ. From the time that I was a small child there was never a time that I remember her not reading her scriptures at night, or saying her personal prayers. Mom has always had such a wonderful knowledge of the Savior...a knowledge that I've been so envious of. Never have I wondered if my Mother believed the things she so passionately taught her children about the gospel because she lives those principals everyday.

Thank you Mom. For everything you've done for me. I wouldn't trade you for anyone in the world to be my Mommy. I love you so much!